As I am sitting here in my childhood room I have a lot of thoughts! So much as happened to me where I feel like God is challenging me! I became a widow at 30 years old, which I thought we would grow old together! Then, in December I had to put one of my dogs down, which really affected me! Thumper was my husbands dog so I felt like putting her down was the last thing I had connected me to him. I know he will always be in my heart, but I break sometimes! I go to bed alone, I wake up alone, & I can't call him when something exciting happens!! I know I have my family, but I definitely not ready to end this chapter in my life. I was diagnosed with Depression in January, & I have been really hard on myself. In June I am going back home to start packing it up, which I will probably really be down a little bit! Paul bought that house in the town where we thought we would grow old together, & I would never have a mortgage. This was our dream house so having to say goodbye is going to be hard. I am not ready to say goodbye, but I know that this is what I need to do. I am going to live with my parents in the house I grew up in until I find a house. I really feel like I am starting over. I don't like what has happened with my life, but I have to understand that this is my new reality! I can only hope it will get better!!
xoxo,
Karebear
No comments:
Post a Comment